The Year I Became Strong

2025 was a life-changing year for me. I moved to Los Angeles with my husband and our pup, wrapping up 8 years of calling the Bay Area our home. Shortly after the move I became very sick without explanation. My symptoms were confusing and inconsistent, except for the disabling pain. I couldn’t stand or walk without tremendous effort, and when the days turned into weeks turned into months without relief, I began to wonder if I would ever feel comfortable and capable in my body again. Fortunately, I was able to build a care team in my new city that listened to my concerns and eventually I learned that I have lupus. I will never not be in awe of modern medicine and I am so grateful that it has helped me reclaim my body.

I am entering 2026 with a profoundly new appreciation for my health and for movement. Before becoming symptomatic, I had much less respect for my body and its limits. I sacrificed rest so that I could say yes to more things. I did not listen when my body sent early clues about my disease, and when my previous doctors dismissed me, I did not push back. My diagnosis has split my life into two distinct chapters. I never considered myself strong before but I do now. I did not earn my strength on my own however; love and friendship sustained and fortified me.

When I remember how it felt during the hardest parts, I can’t help but feel immense gratitude to still be here in 2026. I think somehow my best years are still ahead of me. Even with the persistent horrors, I hold stubbornly to hope. I hope to tell more stories this year, but I needed you to know my own and know that, after everything, I’m still here. Thank you for sticking with me. I hope I see you out there.

Onward—
Marissa